Most Important Update In History Of Universe
Say hello to the only thing that will ever really matter.
http://www.transformersmovie.com/
The countdown is to the teaser trailer. 2007 is a bit farther off than that.
The existence of this movie has been known for some months now; it by itself is not really "news". I've even seen on location pics of shooting locations and various props that have since been removed from the internets. But it wasn't until I saw that big eye gazing malevolently apon the puny earth, and I found myself lying naked on the floor both weeping profusely and masturbating at the same time, that I realised just how profoundly this movie would affect me.
People have long been saying to me "You should have died a long time ago."
This is proof that those people were wrong. I've got to try and stay alive for at least another year. Which is not going to be as easy as it might seem. When I saw this this morning I got so pumped I ran around the house until I slipped in cat puke and toppled into our household "pile of swords". Luckily, they had all been safely tucked into their scabbards, but what if...?
But there is no point dwelling on hypotheticals... I'm reality's biggest fan right now.
It's kind of scary to know that your purpose in being put on this earth is only a year away, though. What comes afterwards? I feel kind of like Count Dooku, or Jesus, when they realised their immediate superior had always meant for them to get bumped off. Here's hoping for plenty of sequels!
I have high hopes for this movie. But I'm also very, um... discriminating... about awarding my approval to hollywood's bread and butter. My anticipation is tempered by trepidation. There's always the possibility they'll screw it up beyond my wildest imagination.
So there are some things that I consider to be absolutely essential to preserving what Transformers is about, and always has been about. They are as follows:
- Car turns into robot.
- Plane turns into robot.
- Robots kick the fuck out of each other.
Give me this and I will come out of the theatre a happy man at least twelve times. Which means this movie is guaranteed to make at least $100 CAN.
Which wouldn't make it a blockbuster by Hollywood standards... but blockbuster of my heart? You bet your britches, princess.
http://www.transformersmovie.com/
The countdown is to the teaser trailer. 2007 is a bit farther off than that.
The existence of this movie has been known for some months now; it by itself is not really "news". I've even seen on location pics of shooting locations and various props that have since been removed from the internets. But it wasn't until I saw that big eye gazing malevolently apon the puny earth, and I found myself lying naked on the floor both weeping profusely and masturbating at the same time, that I realised just how profoundly this movie would affect me.
People have long been saying to me "You should have died a long time ago."
This is proof that those people were wrong. I've got to try and stay alive for at least another year. Which is not going to be as easy as it might seem. When I saw this this morning I got so pumped I ran around the house until I slipped in cat puke and toppled into our household "pile of swords". Luckily, they had all been safely tucked into their scabbards, but what if...?
But there is no point dwelling on hypotheticals... I'm reality's biggest fan right now.
It's kind of scary to know that your purpose in being put on this earth is only a year away, though. What comes afterwards? I feel kind of like Count Dooku, or Jesus, when they realised their immediate superior had always meant for them to get bumped off. Here's hoping for plenty of sequels!
I have high hopes for this movie. But I'm also very, um... discriminating... about awarding my approval to hollywood's bread and butter. My anticipation is tempered by trepidation. There's always the possibility they'll screw it up beyond my wildest imagination.
So there are some things that I consider to be absolutely essential to preserving what Transformers is about, and always has been about. They are as follows:
- Car turns into robot.
- Plane turns into robot.
- Robots kick the fuck out of each other.
Give me this and I will come out of the theatre a happy man at least twelve times. Which means this movie is guaranteed to make at least $100 CAN.
Which wouldn't make it a blockbuster by Hollywood standards... but blockbuster of my heart? You bet your britches, princess.
posted by Jamie S. Luxton III | 4:36 PM
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6 comments
