No Saddam in '07
I can barely see through the tears as I write this. Of the last two days of 2006, this is definately the saddest. I can't believe it has come to this.
The Butcher of Baghdad butches no more.
Around dawn (local time) in sunny Iraq, the sun finally set on the life of Saddam Hussein. He's gone, man. Solid gone.
Allowed to plant one last smootch on the trunk of his miniature Wooly Mammoth, he was then lead to the gallows without pomp or ceremony. Once there, he promptly danced at the end of a rope, without music.
Twas a private affair, with only a few Iraqi officials and Bob Barker in attendance, who tearily thanked him for 24 years of helping control the people population.
"No problem." Saddam is reported to have said. "And thank you, Bob... for A NEW CAR!"
The laughed, but it was hollow, forced laughter.
Many people will be elated by today's news, but not me. I must admit that I wasn't always a Saddam fan. I hated him at first. Because he invaded Kuwait, televised coverage of Desert Storm pre-empted the last half of an excellent episode of Danger Bay. In following years, I only knew him as that lunatic seen on my TV from time to time. It wasn't until I saw Ron Howard's excellent documentary, "Arrested Development", that I decided to do some research, and unexpectedly discovered we had much in common.
1. Stalin. He loved Uncle Joe, and you can't fault a man for that. Stalin was awesome.
2. Raisin Bran Crunch. This stuff is Delicious City in a bowl. Saddam knew it, and because of him, I know it, too.
3. Doritos. I automatically take three steps back from any man who doesn't like Doritos. To like Doritos is to be human. Hussein went fucking bonkers for 'em.
4. Fruit Loops. For a long time I was under the misconception that he enjoyed these pastel crunch rings. Turns out he despised them! What a relief it was more me to discover this! Sometimes when you think you know a person real well, they can still suprise you!
5. That's all I can come up with. But that's still more things in common than I have with the people who surround me daily.
Last year ended with me in a foul mood. The 1986 animated theatrical feature, Transformers: The Movie, is set in the year 2005. But by the time December 31 had rolled around, I had seen no evidence that any of the movie's events had really taken place. Boy, was I pissed!
This year ends on a similar note. In fact, I'm going to go ahead and say that this is even wor... who am I kidding. Last year ended WAY worse. But still, this is right up there. It's pretty bad.
The Butcher of Baghdad butches no more.
Around dawn (local time) in sunny Iraq, the sun finally set on the life of Saddam Hussein. He's gone, man. Solid gone.
Allowed to plant one last smootch on the trunk of his miniature Wooly Mammoth, he was then lead to the gallows without pomp or ceremony. Once there, he promptly danced at the end of a rope, without music.
Twas a private affair, with only a few Iraqi officials and Bob Barker in attendance, who tearily thanked him for 24 years of helping control the people population.
"No problem." Saddam is reported to have said. "And thank you, Bob... for A NEW CAR!"
The laughed, but it was hollow, forced laughter.
Many people will be elated by today's news, but not me. I must admit that I wasn't always a Saddam fan. I hated him at first. Because he invaded Kuwait, televised coverage of Desert Storm pre-empted the last half of an excellent episode of Danger Bay. In following years, I only knew him as that lunatic seen on my TV from time to time. It wasn't until I saw Ron Howard's excellent documentary, "Arrested Development", that I decided to do some research, and unexpectedly discovered we had much in common.
1. Stalin. He loved Uncle Joe, and you can't fault a man for that. Stalin was awesome.
2. Raisin Bran Crunch. This stuff is Delicious City in a bowl. Saddam knew it, and because of him, I know it, too.
3. Doritos. I automatically take three steps back from any man who doesn't like Doritos. To like Doritos is to be human. Hussein went fucking bonkers for 'em.
4. Fruit Loops. For a long time I was under the misconception that he enjoyed these pastel crunch rings. Turns out he despised them! What a relief it was more me to discover this! Sometimes when you think you know a person real well, they can still suprise you!
5. That's all I can come up with. But that's still more things in common than I have with the people who surround me daily.
Last year ended with me in a foul mood. The 1986 animated theatrical feature, Transformers: The Movie, is set in the year 2005. But by the time December 31 had rolled around, I had seen no evidence that any of the movie's events had really taken place. Boy, was I pissed!
This year ends on a similar note. In fact, I'm going to go ahead and say that this is even wor... who am I kidding. Last year ended WAY worse. But still, this is right up there. It's pretty bad.
posted by Jamie S. Luxton III | 9:08 AM
2 Comments:
While the prospect of not having Saddam in '07 is bleak, far worse is that you will also no longer have Saddam in '08, '09, '10 and so on all the way up to '17, when you can finally look forward to seeing him again.
ya' broke yer what?
-Mater
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