State of the Planet Address
So I was downtown yesterday, fondly visiting some of my former favorite places to sleep, and here's what I saw while tooling around.
Two scruffy looking nerf herders are standing next to a truck, engaged in a heated argument. It looked like a drug deal gone awry to me, but what do I know? Anyway, it doesn't go down or something, because the one guy just gets into the truck and starts driving away.
The other guy, who is left standing there, produces from under his jacket a glass bottle of some kind, and whips it at the departing vehicle. The bottle bounces harmlessly off the truck and clatters noisily to the pavement, still intact. I suppose this was not what the guy intended to happen. What the guy probably also did not intend, was for the truck to stop suddenly and for the driver to get out, but that is exactly what happened.
The driver picked up the bottle, walked over to the instigator, and smashed the bottle right on the guy's head! The driver then successfully departed in his truck, while the other guy stumbled around, clutching his head in his hands until he walked into a tree. Eventually, an ambulance came.
Anyway, the point is that yes, folks, irony is alive and well in the world at large. But beware, lest it bite ye in ye own ass!
Two scruffy looking nerf herders are standing next to a truck, engaged in a heated argument. It looked like a drug deal gone awry to me, but what do I know? Anyway, it doesn't go down or something, because the one guy just gets into the truck and starts driving away.
The other guy, who is left standing there, produces from under his jacket a glass bottle of some kind, and whips it at the departing vehicle. The bottle bounces harmlessly off the truck and clatters noisily to the pavement, still intact. I suppose this was not what the guy intended to happen. What the guy probably also did not intend, was for the truck to stop suddenly and for the driver to get out, but that is exactly what happened.
The driver picked up the bottle, walked over to the instigator, and smashed the bottle right on the guy's head! The driver then successfully departed in his truck, while the other guy stumbled around, clutching his head in his hands until he walked into a tree. Eventually, an ambulance came.
Anyway, the point is that yes, folks, irony is alive and well in the world at large. But beware, lest it bite ye in ye own ass!
posted by Jamie S. Luxton III | 10:41 AM
7 Comments:
Ha Ha Ha! Excellent! EXCELLENT!!!
Who's scruffy lookin'?
Jamie, how is it all these crazy things happen to you all the time? I just love living vicariously through you. My life seems so boring compared to yours. I mean, all the hookers that I try to get to live with me just never stay!
O and by the way, could you give me your sisters phone number? I've been meaning to ask her something.
I have to risk being ignorant here- okay I am ignorant- and ask what the hell a nerf herder is. I have to know. Please enlighten me and can i use it?
hey shazamike, i know you love robots, so here you go: http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=7969588929408497044
My good Mr. Luxton,
I'm delighted to see that a resourceful young man such as yourself using his time so wisely. I would advise, however, that you take good care. Spectator sports such as this can be dangerous. Gentlemen engaged in bottle battles have known to become aggressive with squeeby notetakers standing on the sidelines.
That said, Luxton, I've missed you. Stop in and check out why Geraldo Rivera's best asset is not his winning on-screen persona.
Bouquets to you.
This sounds like that one time I was walking down the road when I heard this kid shout out: "Lights out mister monkey wrench." Then a guy ran by with a pair of brass knuckles. All I could think was: "These kids are out of control!"... no wait... all I could really think was: "Damn I need a pair of those."
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